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Freedom of Speech?

The only reasonable response to the massacre of 12 people at the satirical French publication Charlie Hebdo is condemnation. It is never acceptable to respond to freedom of speech with violence and terror.

Having said that, however, there is quite a bit of irony around this event, and I would be remiss in my duties as Iron Knee if I did not mention it. But the fact that I bring it up should not be construed in any way that I have sympathy for the terrorists (or any terrorists).

The biggest irony is that the cover of Charlie Hebdo that was published just before the attack on their offices was not making fun of Islam. Instead, the cover was making fun of novelist Michel Houellebecq, whose negative attitude toward Islam is well known (he was once sued in court for calling Islam “stupid”). So how ironic is it that supposedly Islamic terrorists attacked the newspaper over a cover that was making fun of someone who doesn’t like Islam. Whatever happened to “the enemy of my enemy is my friend”?

In addition, AlJazeera published an article that makes a pretty good case that the attack on Charlie Hebdo was not about Islam at all. Two of the attackers were from Algeria, and another was from Senegal. These are both countries that suffered mightily under French colonialism (Algeria alone lost over a million lives in the ensuing brutal civil war, and Senegal was likely worse off).

It is also interesting that the reaction in Arab newspapers has been strongly against the attack.

Also ironically, there has been an outpouring of support for Charlie Hebdo, calling the massacre an attack on free speech. Really?

Back in 2009, Charlie Hebdo published a column by Maurice Sinet. Jean Sarkozy, the son of the French president, had just become engaged to the Jewish heiress of a successful electronics goods chain. The column commented on a rumor that Sarkozy was going to convert to Judaism by saying “He’ll go a long way in life, that little lad.” Relatively tame stuff, but the column was attacked as anti-Semitic (for linking prejudice about Jews and success). The editor of Charlie Hebdo asked Sinet to apologize and when he refused, he was fired. Sinet was then charged with the crime of “inciting racial hatred” and anti-Semitism. Where were the defenders of free speech then? Is it free speech when you make fun of Islam, but not when you make fun of Judaism?

Indeed, many of the people expressing support for Charlie Hebdo after the attack had condemned the newspaper in the past. Charlie Hebdo was an equal opportunity satirical publication, and it especially loved making fun of people with power and influence. In fact, a cartoonist for the newspaper who was not in the office at the time of the attack said in an interview “We vomit on all these people who suddenly say they are our friends.” He says it makes him laugh to get support from the Pope, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin, all people who have been satirized by the publication.

Finally, I am tired of people attacking all of Islam because of the actions of a few terrorist extremists. Last week, comedian Bill Maher went on the offensive against Muslims, claiming that many of them supported the attack:

I know most Muslim people would not have carried out an attack like this. But here’s the important point: Hundreds of millions of them support an attack like this. They applaud an attack like this. What they say is, “We don’t approve of violence, but you know what? When you make fun of the Prophet, all bets are off.”

I could make a similar claim about Christians supporting the murder of people who worked in abortion clinics. Many Christians still claim that abortion is murder, which justifies the killing of abortion doctors and nurses. So should we (do we) condemn all of Christianity because of that?

Terrorism is wrong. But Muslims are not the only terrorists. Even including 9/11, only 6% of terrorist attacks between 1980 and 2005 in the US were carried out by Islamic extremists. You might think this is because the US is somewhat far away from Muslims. But in Europe (next door to Arab countries), Islamic extremists are responsible for only 0.4% of terrorist acts.

Charlie Hebdo

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Late Night Political Humor

“Joe Biden went to Brazil in an effort to try and repair America’s relationship with their government. Biden said, ‘It’s great to be here in the Amazon. I’ve always wanted to see where all the books come from.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Kim Jong Un’s sister got married. That sounds like another Seth Rogen movie, doesn’t it?” – David Letterman

“Instead of reading vows at the wedding ceremony, they read hacked Sony emails.” – David Letterman

“Democratic Senator Harry Reid is expected to make a full recovery after he was exercising with a resistance band that snapped, causing him to fall. The good news is he’s fine. The bad news is there’s no video of it.” – Jimmy Fallon

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The Enemy of Freedom…

Jen Sorensen
© Jen Sorensen

Absolute freedom is another name for anarchy and feudalism. The solution is to find a fair compromise based on facts. Too bad we seem to have forgotten how to do that.

In addition, this comic failed to mention religious freedom. Given the recent news, probably wisely.

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First Orders of Business

So what did the new Republican-controlled Congress decide was their first order of business this week?

On their very first day, they decided that the most important thing to do was attack Social Security. But they did it in a sneaky and underhanded way. The House passed a new rule that, as the LA Times puts it, “will seriously undermine efforts to keep all of Social Security solvent.”

Or as Senator Elizabeth Warren points out, the Republicans are “inventing a Social Security crisis.” You see, the Republicans figured out that they can’t eliminate the social safety net directly – that would be too unpopular. So instead they pass rules that will make it insolvent, so they can step in and “save” it (by eliminating it and replacing it with some kind of voucher program).

But that wasn’t the only thing. They introduced a bill to restrict abortions. Also on the very first day they were in session.

That was just the House. Over in the Senate, Mitch McConnell tried to rewrite history in an almost comical manner. On the Senate floor, McConnell said:

After so many years of sluggish growth, we’re finally starting to see some economic data that can provide a glimmer of hope. The uptick appears to coincide with the biggest political change of the Obama administration’s long tenure in Washington: The expectation of a new Republican Congress.

That’s right. The Republican gains in Congress scared the economy into improving! And not only that, it happened retroactively! That is some powerful juju. And no wonder the economy is scared — the only thing the Republicans have done for the economy lately is cause a government shutdown (because Obama refused to dismantle Obamacare), which caused all kinds of job losses and cost us $24 billion.

And just where do you suppose the bad economy came from in the first place? Is the GOP going to find some way to blame that on Obama too?

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More Exceptionalism

Tom Tomorrow
© Tom Tomorrow

So the NYPD doesn’t want to have to be accountable for their actions. Sound familiar? Between this, torture, spying on our own citizens, preemptive wars, and murder by drone, it seems like we are just full of our own exceptionalism.

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The 70% Solution

Florida became the 36th state to legalize gay marriage yesterday. That means that 70% of Americans live in a state where same-sex couples can marry, and marry they did.

While a story like this isn’t ironic anymore, that in itself is what is ironic about it. Yes, there are a few people in Florida who are upset about it (one Court Clerk shut down the courthouse chapel so that no marriage ceremonies – gay or straight – could be performed), but most people are either happy about the change, or more interestingly, don’t care.

Gay marriage is now overwhelmingly legal in the US, and the world didn’t end. In fact, in the end, it has become a non-story. As it should be. The government has no interest in regulating what has become a personal decision with no meaningful negative societal consequences.

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Strike Three?

Matt Bors
© Matt Bors

Wouldn’t it be ironic if by staging a “work slowdown” the NYPD actually put things back to the way they were before we over-militarized our police departments? Could this possibly be a good thing? So far, the worst effect of the slowdown seems to be the loss of millions of dollars in traffic ticket fines, a major source of money for New York City. So far, the 55% drop in arrests has not led to any dramatic increase in crime.

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Late Night Political Humor

“During a recent Q & A with children, first lady Michelle Obama said that what she wants for Christmas is to sleep in late. Which is why this year Biden promised not to jump on her bed when it’s time to open presents.” – Jimmy Fallon

“The White House hosted its annual Hanukkah party and everything was going great until Biden pulled on a rabbi’s beard and said, ‘You’re not Santa’.” – Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama and his family are spending the holidays in Hawaii, and while they’re gone, they got a fence jumper to house sit. Tomorrow, he will be in Hawaii playing golf with Raul Castro and the Pope.” – David Letterman

“The U.S. is re-establishing relations with Cuba. But before President Obama can lift the embargo, it will need approval from the Republican-controlled Congress – or as Republicans who called Obama said, ‘Close, but no cigar’.” – Jimmy Fallon

“The Russian economy is tanking. It’s gotten so bad that today Vladimir Putin had to pawn his stolen Super Bowl ring. And Putin will finance his next invasion on Kickstarter.” – David Letterman

“Economists believe there are three reasons why the Russian economy is doing so poorly. One, economic sanctions are working. Number two, low-price oil. And number three, Lindsay Lohan has quit drinking vodka.” – David Letterman

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Future Perfect?

Lee Judge
© Lee Judge

I’ve made my fair share of bad predictions, but at least I try to admit it when I’m wrong.

But some people seem to make a career out of being constantly wrong. Take Grover Norquist (please!), who has announced (without irony) that he “would like Republicans to shut up about how bad the economy is, and instead take credit for the recovery.” That’s right, the man who is most known for demanding fealty to his pledge to never, ever raise taxes wants the GOP to brag that the Bush tax cuts are responsible for the recovering economy. Never mind that it is largely the Bush tax cuts that we are recovering from. And never mind that 98 percent of economists believe that the recovery is due to the economic stimulus act passed in 2009.

Norquist isn’t the only one. Art Laffer (he of the “Laffer Curve” and trickle-down economics) went on Fox News last Friday and claimed that the only reason the economy is improving at all is because we ran out of stimulus money. Plus the standard GOP talking point that Obama’s recovery actually sucks compared to Reagan’s recovery (actually, it doesn’t).

(hat tip to Wonkette).

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Welcome to the New Political Irony

Political Irony is now running on a shiny new private server! Hopefully, this means that it will be much faster and more reliable. It will also handle more traffic.

Speaking of more traffic, if you enjoy a post here please think about submitting it to a web aggregator (like Reddit or StumbleUpon). At the bottom of each post there is an (easily overlooked) “Share / Save” button that will do this for you (or of course you can do it yourself). Who knows, if I get more readers maybe my one lone ad will generate enough to pay for the new server!

Let me know if you notice any problems with the new site.

–iron knee

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Bachmann Gives Us Gas

Michele Bachmann may be leaving Congress, but she just had to make one last silly gesture. She took to Twitter this week and posted a photo of herself standing under a gasoline station sign with the caption “$2 gas, anyone?”

Michele Bachmann gives us gas

Just in case you didn’t get the message, conservative writer Mollie Hemingway retweeted it with the comment “Oh, look! Despite the mocking, Michele Bachmann predicted correctly after all.” Conservative rag WorldNetDaily ran the story under the headline “Michele Bachmann Gets Last Laugh at Her Critics.”

There is just one problem with Bachmann taking credit for the current low gas prices. During her failed run for the presidency Bachmann promised “Under President Bachmann you will see gasoline come down below $2 a gallon again. That will happen.”

She may have gotten the price right, but one has to wonder if she is aware that she isn’t president.

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Late Night Political Humor

“Sony Pictures has canceled the release of ‘The Interview’ due to continued threats from hackers. This means the hackers have accomplished their goal of making everyone in the world want to see ‘The Interview’.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Sony has canceled the big Seth Rogen movie, ‘The Interview’. North Koreans hacked their email so Sony said, ‘Now we can’t show anybody the movie.’ I’m disappointed. I think this is the wrong thing to do. And I hear in the film Meryl Streep is great as Kim Jong Un.” – Conan O’Brien

“Everyone’s weighing in on Sony’s cancellation of ‘The Interview’. Mitt Romney suggested the film should be released online for free. Donald Trump said the studio has no courage or guts. Chris Christie said, ‘Either way, I’m having a large bucket of popcorn.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“If Sony’s not going to show ‘The Interview,’ that’s it. No more North Korean movies for me.” – Conan O’Brien

“The ‘Star Wars’ movie is coming out. Disney has kept the details of the movie under wraps because they’re not Sony.” – Craig Ferguson

“‘Star Wars: Episode VII’ comes out exactly one year from today — as long as we don’t get threats from Darth Vader.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“During a recent interview, President Obama revealed that his favorite movie this year was ‘Boyhood’. It makes sense. If there’s one thing Obama can identify with, it’s aging several years over the course of a couple of hours.” – Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama said his favorite movie this year was ‘Boyhood’. When asked what his second-favorite movie was, he said, ”The Interview’. No, definitely not ‘The Interview’. I didn’t see ‘The Interview’.” – Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama announced yesterday that he’s pardoning 12 convicted felons. Political experts say the move could have huge implications for your fantasy football teams.” – Seth Meyers

“Here’s what we know about Santa. He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. He knows if you’ve been bad or good. I think he’s with the NSA.” – Conan O’Brien

“Russian President Vladimir Putin said at a press conference today that it was too early to decide if he will run for re-election in 2018. But he says it’s not too early to decide how much he wins by.” – Seth Meyers

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Oh Brother!

Jeb Bush Resigns as George W. Bush’s Brother

WASHINGTON (Satire from The Borowitz Report)—In the strongest sign to date that he intends to seek the 2016 Republican Presidential nomination, former Florida Governor Jeb Bush has officially resigned his position as George W. Bush’s brother.

“No longer being related to his brother is a key step to clearing Jeb’s path to the nomination,” an aide said on New Year’s Day. “We expect his poll numbers to soar on this.”

According to the aide, the former Florida governor resigned his post as brother in a ten-minute phone call with George W. Bush, after which he blocked the former President’s phone number and e-mail address.

In an official statement, George W. Bush said that he “understands and supports” his former brother’s decision.

“If I were him, I would no longer be related to me either,” he said.

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Strange Bedfellows

Who says bipartisanship isn’t alive?

Last week Congresscritter Steve Scalise (R-LA) admitted that in 2002 he spoke at a white supremacist organization founded by former Ku Klux Klan leader David Duke.

Not overly surprising. Heck, not that long ago Louisiana was as racist as they get. David Duke himself had served in the state legislature and was the Republican candidate for governor in 1991, even though he was not only the former grand wizard of the KKK, but was also a convicted felon. Duke had defrauded supporters by falsely claiming to have no money and being in danger of losing his home, in order to solicit emergency donations (he was actually financially secure and had used the donations for recreational gambling).

Scalise doesn’t deny that he spoke to the white nationalist organization but claims that he doesn’t remember doing so, which is pretty hard to believe as David Duke was both a fellow Louisiana politician and in the news frequently. In an interview back in 1999 about Duke, Scalise even claimed that he embraces many of the same “conservative” views as Duke, saying:

The novelty of David Duke has worn off. The voters in this district are smart enough to realize that they need to get behind someone who not only believes in the issues they care about, but also can get elected. Duke has proven that he can’t get elected, and that’s the first and most important thing.

But it gets even more ironic. Among Scalise’s defenders is black Democrat Rep. Cedric Richmond, who says that he doesn’t “think Steve has a racist bone in his body” and that the Scalise is being used as a “scapegoat to score political points”. Louisiana governor Bobby Jindal, whose parents are from India, defended Scalise as being “fair-minded and kindhearted”. Jewish friends said that it is “unthinkable” that Scalise has racist views.

But conservative Erick Erickson attacked Scalise, saying:

How the hell does somebody show up at a David Duke organized event in 2002 and claim ignorance? How do you not investigate?… [Sen.] Trent Lott was driven from the field in 2001 for something less than this.

I personally think people should be forgiven for ugly views that they may have held in the past, when those views were more common (as long as there is good evidence that they no longer hold them). Besides, my guess was that Scalise was really just pandering for votes. If we held that against politicians, there would be nobody left to elect.

UPDATE: David Duke claims he has ties to many legislators, both Republican and Democrat, and threatens to release a list of them if people don’t lay off of Steve Scalise. Duke says “If Scalise is going to be crucified — if Republicans want to throw Steve Scalise to the woods — then a lot of them better be looking over their shoulders.”

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Late Night Political Humor

“Today President Obama announced that the U.S. is working to improve its relationship with Cuba in an effort to normalize full diplomatic relations. For instance, today they released one of our prisoners and in return we sent back one of their shortstops.” – Jimmy Fallon

“The White House announced plans to begin normalizing relations with Cuba — this as we’re awkwardizing relations with Russia.” – Craig Ferguson

“The White House will ease diplomatic relations with Cuba. When asked how he’ll celebrate, Obama said, ‘Smoke a Cuban cigar, no I mean smoke a regular cigarette — oh, I’ll just have some water, I guess, I don’t know.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“You probably heard about the big prisoner swap with Cuba. A man who has been incarcerated in Havana for five years is back home in the United States. And we sent them some prisoners. The deal still has to be approved by President Obama and Bud Selig.” – David Letterman

“President Obama announced that he’s going to reopen diplomatic relations with Cuba. He wants to act before Seth Rogen makes a movie about Castro.” – Conan O’Brien

“Sony hackers are threatening to attack theaters that show Seth Rogen’s new comedy about an attempt on North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un’s life. In response, the big theater chains won’t show the movie. They should be ashamed of themselves. The idea that there are North Korean terror cells in the U.S. is ridiculous. If there are any North Koreans in America, that’s only because they escaped.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Those North Korean hackers are at it again. Earlier today they leaked Santa’s naughty list.” – David Letterman

“After the theaters backed out, Sony decided to cancel the release of the movie entirely and nobody knows if the movie will be seen. The only way we’re ever going to see it is to hack into Sony. If only there was a group that knew how to do that.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“If the North Koreans are going to stop one of our movies being shown, why couldn’t it be ‘Love Actually,’ which my wife and her friends have in our living room every Christmas?” – Jimmy Kimmel

“The message this sends is that if you really scare us, we’ll do what you want. Poor Seth Rogen. I heard he’s so stressed out by this that he’s been smoking marijuana.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“A new report says ISIS is trying to recruit professionals like doctors, engineers, and accountants. Sorry, kids, even ISIS says they’re not hiring liberal arts majors.” – Conan O’Brien

“In an interview, President Obama said he recently deejayed a small dance party at the White House. Obama has a lot in common with deejays. He takes requests and then completely ignores them.” – Jimmy Fallon

“After closing their final session, the outgoing 113th Congress has an approval rating of just 16 percent. To give you some perspective, Cosby is at 17.” – Seth Meyers

“Despite Russia’s move to raise interest rates this week, the value of the ruble has continued to crash. Russia’s economy is so bad, Edward Snowden had to put government secrets on Craigslist.” – Jimmy Fallon

“A new poll about the 2016 election shows that just 27 percent of voters would be likely to support Chris Christie. And only 4 percent of chairs.” – Seth Meyers

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