Skip to content

Good News from the Republicans

Monday, April 20, 2015

I finally have something good to report about the Republicans. According to the LA Times, the GOP has given up on trying to repeal Obamacare. It only took five years, more than fifty repeal votes, and a few government shutdowns, but occasionally you can teach the Grand Old Party new tricks.

According to a prominent Republican pollster, “Only 18% of Americans want to go back to the system we had before because they do not want to go back to some of the problems we had.” The only remaining problem is that those 18% appear to be the core of the Republican base. The ACA remains extremely unpopular with GOP voters. But repealing it would anger everyone else, including the 20 million people who depend on it for their health insurance.

So expect more saber rattling from GOP candidates during the upcoming election, but absolutely no real action to get rid of the law.

Ironically, Republican politicians are even making proposals to ensure the continuing health of Obamacare. This year, the Supreme Court could strip away the insurance subsidies available to states that use the federal exchange, and would likely leave 8.3 million people uninsured.

The only solution would be for Congress to fix the law, and Congress is controlled by Republicans, who supposedly want to kill the ACA. Several GOP Congresscritters have already proposed extending the subsidies. What will they say to their base when they propose changes to save Obamacare?

Share
Filed in Irony | Comments (3)

Late Night Political Humor

Monday, April 20, 2015

“President Obama just made his first presidential trip to the state of Utah. Obama spent his time in Utah just like you’d expect — telling people, ‘Uh, no, I don’t play for the Jazz.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“While he was in Utah, Obama discussed immigration reform with leaders of the Mormon Church. Obama introduced the first lady. Then the church’s president introduced HIS first lady. And his second lady. And his third, fourth, and fifth ladies.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Today was the annual Easter egg roll on the White House lawn. Usually when you see something rolling on the White House lawn it’s a drunk Secret Service agent.” – Conan O’Brien

“Jeb Bush is facing criticism after it was just revealed that he checked off his race as ‘Hispanic’ on a voter registration form back in 2009. When asked if he regrets it now, Bush said, ‘Si’.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Jeb Bush identified himself as Hispanic, so I guess it’s actually pronounced ‘Yeb Bush.'” – Seth Meyers

“According to The New York Times, Jeb Bush identified himself as Hispanic on his 2009 voter registration form. While Hillary Clinton identified herself as ‘President’.” – Seth Meyers

“On Easter, the Pope asked for peace in the Middle East. There are two groups the Pope has to contend with — Jewish people and Muslims. They couldn’t wait to hear his suggestions.” – Conan O’Brien

Share
Filed in Humor | Comments Off on Late Night Political Humor

Known By Their Deeds

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Recently, Republicans have been trying to sound like class warriors, claiming that they care about the widening gap between the rich and the poor. Former VP candidate Paul Ryan (R-WI) complained that “The Obmamnomics that we’re practicing now have exacerbated inequality”, and added that only “the wealthy are doing really well.” In January, Mitt Romney (Mr. 47%) told the RNC that he was concerned that “the rich have gotten richer” and “income inequality has gotten worse”. Even Ted Cruz (R-TX) got into the act, warning that “Right now, the top 1 percent in this country, the millionaires and billionaires the president demagogues so much, earn a higher share of our national income than any time since 1928.”

Those are their words, but what do they plan to actually do about it?

Raise the minimum wage? Of course not!
Close tax loopholes that primarily benefit the wealthy? Never!
Extend unemployment benefits? That would only encourage freeloading.
Expand Medicare to the poor? Over their dead bodies!

What the GOP did do is vote to abolish the Estate Tax.

This is not another tax cut that favors the wealthy (like we have seen many times before), this is a massive $269 billion giveaway that ONLY benefits the top 0.2%. Already the first $10.86 million that a couple leaves behind when they pass away is not taxed (half that amount for individuals). So abolishing the estate tax entirely only benefits estates bigger than that, the richest of the rich.

Not only would this substantially increase income inequality, it dramatically enlarges the entrenched rich aristocracy that our founders fought to get rid of, creating a permanent elite of trust-fund babies.

And where does that $269 billion come from? The Republican bill simply adds the entire cost to the deficit, putting the lie to GOP claims of fiscal responsibility.

monopoly

[In case you can’t tell, this image is based on the British version of the Monopoly game. Whitechapel Road is one of the two cheapest properties, like Baltic and Mediterranean in the US version.]

Share
Filed in Hypocrisy | Comments (2)

Approval Ratings?

Saturday, April 18, 2015

hillary-vs-congress-approval

I don’t know where they got their numbers. The approval rating for Congress is now around 18% (although it went below 10% near the end of 2013). And Hillary Clinton’s approval rating is around 50% (although a few polls have put it higher than 67% in the past).

Although this meme is still funny.

And they seem to be correct in how often she has been named America’s “Most Admired Woman”.

Share
Filed in Irony | Comments Off on Approval Ratings?

Un American

Friday, April 17, 2015

A very interesting survey from Bloomberg politics turns up results that are rather disturbing. I’ll quote directly from Bloomberg:

Republicans by a ratio of more than 2-to-1 say the U.S. should support Israel even when its stances diverge with American interests … Democrats, by roughly the same ratio, say the opposite is true and that the U.S. must pursue its own interests over Israel’s.

You read that right. Republicans put Israel’s interests above American interests. Can this possibly be true? Are Republicans really more loyal to a foreign country than to America? They would support Israel even if it was against our interests? And they are willing to say this out loud to a pollster?

Continuing the shocking results:

Republicans say they feel more sympathetic to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu than to their own president, 67 percent to 16 percent, while Democrats are more sympathetic to President Barack Obama than to Israel’s prime minister, 76 percent to 9 percent.

I have a simple suggestion. If they really love another country more than America, the GOP should become the multi-Millineum Old Party and move to Israel. But I have to warn them what they will find there: socialized health care, taxpayer-funded abortions, and no Christmas. Oy Vey!

Share
Filed in Irony | Comments (8)

Fair and Balanced

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Jen Sorensen
© Jen Sorensen

I have to admit that I was never a big fan of Bill Clinton, and in 2008 I supported Barack Obama over Hillary Clinton. But I think I actually feel better about Clinton being president now. I saw her speak and answer questions a few months ago, and was more impressed. I think her experience in the Senate and in Obama’s administration made her more relaxed and realistic.

Of course it helps that the only alternative will be someone who survives the “stupider than thou” Republican primary. I also think Hillary Clinton has more experience dealing with the Party of No. Her and Bill’s ability to triangulate might just stand a chance of breaking apart the Republican unholy coalition of social conservatives and greedy corporations, even if just by winning over the greedy corporations.

And as this comic puts it, she is the only realistic choice.

Share
Filed in Irony | Comments (14)

Late Night Political Humor

Thursday, April 16, 2015

“After months of negotiations, Iran has finally agreed to reduce its nuclear weapons program. Which was great until Putin showed up and said, ‘Hi, I’m here about Craigslist ad for nukes.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Iran said it will give up trying to make a nuclear weapon. But it got awkward when Iran said, ‘But just for Lent. We’ll start again on Monday.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“According to a new survey, almost half of the voters in Ohio, Florida, and Pennsylvania say that they do not trust Hillary Clinton. Republicans immediately got together and said, ‘OK, this is a huge opportunity for us. How are we going to screw it up?'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Kids in Washington every year have the big Easter egg roll on the White House lawn. The kids found 300 Easter eggs. They also found about 10,000 missing Hillary emails.” – David Letterman

“Many people are noting the difference between Hillary Clinton’s friendly public appearances and her blunt and direct Twitter account. Yeah, she’s nice in person, and mean on the Internet. You know, kinda like EVERYONE.” – Jimmy Fallon

“We have first lady Michelle Obama on the show tonight. As you’d expect, security’s been pretty tight. On my way in I got five pat-downs, and that was just from Joe Biden.” – Jimmy Fallon

“We actually had to tape earlier than usual today. Not because of the first lady’s schedule, but so the Secret Service could make it to happy hour.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Right after the show tonight, I’m going to the New York City car show. You get to see the models that will be crashed next year by drunken Secret Service agents.” – David Letterman

“A new survey out says 64 percent of Americans own a smartphone. Which is interesting because in a related survey, 100 percent of smart phones say they own an American.” – Jimmy Fallon

Share
Filed in Humor | Comments Off on Late Night Political Humor

The Week in Review

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Tom Tomorrow
© Tom Tomorrow

Who could have predicted that the week when I went out of town could have produced so much irony in my absence! My only question is, should I go on vacation more often?

Share
Filed in Humor | Comments (2)

Late Night Political Humor

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

“President Obama has reduced the sentences of 22 federal prisoners who were arrested for drug-related crimes — eight of whom were serving life sentences. It marks the first time someone has said ‘Thanks Obama’ but actually meant it.” – Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama and his wife are going to Kenya. Donald Trump said, ‘While you’re there, pick up your birth certificate.'” – David Letterman

“Indiana’s governor is coming under fire for a new law that some people feel is anti-gay. The governor now says he is not anti-gay. Then immediately afterwards he said, ‘April Fools’. It wasn’t his best joke.” – Conan O’Brien

“In Indiana, state legislators played a hilarious April Fools’ prank on gays and lesbians. They convinced them they’d passed a law that would let businesses discriminate against them.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“You’ve all heard about the Indiana religious freedom law? Some people think it’s anti-gay. Well, presidential hopefuls Jeb Bush, Ted Cruz, and Scott Walker have all come out in favor of the new law. Well, I guess I shouldn’t say ‘come out’.” – Seth Meyers

“Rand Paul is taking a week-long break from talking to the media to spend time with his family before he officially announces that he is running for president. Because nothing motivates you to be on the road for two straight years like a week alone with your family.” – Jimmy Fallon

Share
Filed in Humor | Comments Off on Late Night Political Humor

Principles Lost

Monday, April 13, 2015

Ted Rall
© Ted Rall

This reminds me of all the campaign speeches Obama made about openness and transparency in government, and how we should protect government whistleblowers. He didn’t change in order to get elected, but he sure changed after he got elected.

Yes, Obama did sign a law protecting whistleblowers last year, I’ll give him credit for that. But he has run an administration that is hardly transparent at all, and has prosecuted whistleblowers much more aggressively than his predecessors.

Share
Filed in Irony | Comments (8)

Late Night Political Humor

Sunday, April 12, 2015

“The White House announced that President Obama will attend a summit in Kenya this July. When asked if he’s ever been to Kenya, Obama said, ‘Of course. I was born — no, bored — over there. There’s nothing to do in Kenya.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“As of this week, the only state that President Obama has not visited while in office is South Dakota. Residents of South Dakota said they’re looking forward to President Obama or any black person visiting soon.” – Conan O’Brien

“It was announced that President Obama and his wife, when they’re finished in Washington, are moving to New York City. The guy just can’t get enough gridlock.” – David Letterman

“According to a new poll, Republicans are more likely to have a doughnut for breakfast, while Democrats prefer to eat bagels and croissants. While Independents are that annoying friend who’s still looking at the menu after 15 minutes.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Al Gore is 67 years old today. Al Gore, 67 candles on his cake. There’s your global warming. ” – David Letterman

“According to a new study, the marijuana in Colorado is almost twice as strong as it was 20 years ago. Of course, people had some questions for the scientists, like ‘How can I get your job?'” – Jimmy Fallon

Share
Filed in Humor | Comments Off on Late Night Political Humor

Terrorist Plots

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Today we have a story that triples down on the irony.

The FBI recently announced that they had uncovered a terrorist plot to build explosive devices in New York City. But the more you look into it, the more it looks like a couple of stupid kids who had little or no chance of actually doing anything until an undercover FBI informant arrived to “help” them with their plans.

But that didn’t stop Senator Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) from responding that this shows that we should ban the book “The Anarchist Cookbook” from the internet (because they had a copy).

Yes, you can download a book from the Internet that has instructions for building bombs. But that’s not the only place you can get it. You can buy it at many bookstores, including Amazon. And the book was originally written using information available in any library. Removing The Anarchist Cookbook from the internet would not only not stop people from getting this kind of information, it would violate the First Amendment (according to the US Department of Justice, banning it would likely be unconstitutional).

Censoring the internet is not something that should be considered litely. We are dismayed when countries like China try to censor the internet.

Just to bring this story full circle, it turns out that it was the FBI informant who told the two would-be terrorists about The Anarchist Cookbook and downloaded it for them. The criminal complaint against them even has them thanking the undercover agent for introducing the book to them. In other words, neither of them downloaded anything from the internet, the government conveniently did it for them. And for this we should censor the internet?

Share
Filed in Irony | Comments (5)

Projection

Friday, April 10, 2015

There is an interesting phenomenon in psychology called projection. According to Wikipedia:

Psychological projection is a theory in psychology in which humans defend themselves against unpleasant impulses by denying their existence in themselves, while attributing them to others. For example, a person who is rude may constantly accuse other people of being rude.

According to some research, the projection of one’s negative qualities onto others is a common process in everyday life.

This explains why Dick Cheney won’t shut up about Obama. Appearing on conservative talk radio on Tuesday, Cheney said:

I vacillate between the various theories I’ve heard, but you know, if you had somebody as president who wanted to take America down, who wanted to fundamentally weaken our position in the world and reduce our capacity to influence events, turn our back on our allies and encourage our adversaries, it would look exactly like what Barack Obama’s doing. I think his actions are constituted in my mind those of the worst president we’ve ever had.

Cheney’s statements are not really about Obama, they are about his own demons. After all, who ignored urgent warnings about 9/11, flaunted international law and our allies to unilaterally start two wars using lies, which helped our adversaries recruit even more terrorists in the Middle East? Not to mention almost destroying our economy and running up huge deficits, weakening us even more.

Ironically, Thursday was the 12th anniversary of what some people call the “greatest memo of all time“. The memo was sent by Bush and Cheney’s Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, basically saying that all of the Bush administration’s foreign policy initiatives were failing and asking the Undersecretary of Defense to come up with solutions:

Rumsfeld

Share
Filed in Hypocrisy | Comments (1)

Separation of Powers

Thursday, April 9, 2015

One of the big complaints recently about Obama has been that he is acting like a king or dictator, doing end-runs around Congress such as allowing illegal aliens to avoid being deported. After all, we have three branches of government to provide checks and balances.

So it surprised me when Ted Cruz said Monday that he would encourage Congress to do an end run around the Supreme Court (a court, I might add, that is already pretty darn conservative).

Speaking about the possibility that the Supreme Court might decide in favor of marriage equality, Cruz promised the following (according to the Dallas Morning News):

He reiterated his vow to press for a constitutional amendment that would clarify the power of state legislatures to define marriage as the union of one man and one woman. If the high court does legalize gay marriage nationwide, he added, he would prod Congress to strip federal courts of jurisdiction over the issue, a rarely invoked legislative tool.

First of all, it is always hilarious when presidential candidates promise to work on constitutional amendments, as it is one of the few things for which presidents have no authority at all. They can’t even veto them.

But his promise to prod Congress to strip federal courts of jurisdiction over gay marriage is really scary. Court stripping is a theoretical idea that Congress can pass a federal law that effectively tells the courts that they are not allowed to review lawsuits pertaining to certain subjects (in this case, gay marriage). In other words, it gives Congress absolute power over the courts.

Conservatives complain about “legislating from the bench”. Well, this is the same thing in reverse, “adjudicating from the legislature”. It is Congress dictating constitutional law to the courts, which completely destroys our independent judiciary.

Court stripping is not a new idea. Back in the 1980s, another crazy conservative Senator, Jesse Helms (R-NC) repeatedly tried to prevent federal courts from hearing cases related to school prayer. More recently, Sam Brownback (now the governor who is destroying Kansas) and Todd Akin tried to do the same thing about the Pledge of Allegiance. But both attempts failed.

There’s little chance Cruz could implement court stripping over gay marriage. After all, a strong majority of Americans support marriage equality. But it just demonstrates that when conservatives scream about separation of powers, they are only throwing a temper tantrum because they didn’t get their way.

Share
Filed in Hypocrisy | Comments (14)

Late Night Political Humor

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

“There are reports that President Obama and his family may move to New York City after his term is over. Unfortunately, the city is so expensive, he’s looking for another ex-president to be roommates with.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Apparently, the Obamas chose New York City because they’ve gotten so used to people trying to break into their house.” – Jimmy Fallon

“During a speech on Friday, Senator Ted Cruz said that if you walk up to someone and say ‘Joe Biden’, the person will crack up laughing. Which is the same reaction you get if you say ‘President Ted Cruz’.” – Seth Meyers

“This Hillary Clinton scandal has to do with emails. All I get are emails for Canadian Viagra.” – David Letterman

“Hillary has now erased all of her emails, and she also had all of her pantsuits dry cleaned. ” – David Letterman

“Governor Chris Christie defended his stance against legalizing marijuana, saying that any tax revenue generated from pot sales would be blood money. Then businessmen in New Jersey said, ‘Yeah, and we can’t have that sort of thing here in New Jersey.’ – Jimmy Fallon

“Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid says he will not seek re-election. Harry said he wants to spend more time with his family. As I always say, check with your family.” – David Letterman

Share
Filed in Humor | Comments Off on Late Night Political Humor