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Cheapskate

What’s worse than a cheapskate? A cheapskate who lies about being generous.

Trump repeatedly promises money to charities and then stiffs them.

According to the Washington Post:

In the past 15 years, Trump has promised to donate earnings from a wide variety of his money-making enterprises: “The Apprentice.” Trump Vodka. Trump University. A book. Another book. If he honored all those pledges, Trump’s gifts to charity would have topped $8.5 million.

Trump also brags about his charitable foundation, but the last record of any gift from him to the foundation was in 2008.

The Post also contacted 167 charities with some connection to Trump (like, he appeared at an event for them, or praised them publicly), but between 2008 and this May they could only find one donation to any of them, and that was for less than $10,000. That’s right, in eight years a person who claims to be worth $10 billion only donated one millionth of his (claimed) net worth to charity. To put that in perspective, the person just behind Trump on Forbes’s ranking of net worth gave $120 million to charity in 2013 alone.

But that doesn’t stop Trump from lying about his generosity. As the Post put it “What has set Trump apart from other wealthy philanthropists is not how much he gives — it is how often he promises that he is going to give.”

Trump seems to use promises of gifts to charity as a sleazy sales technique. After all, people are more willing to buy something (and Trump is always selling something) if they think the proceeds are going to charity.

Don’t get me wrong. Trump has donated money to charities from time to time. Like recently, when Trump held a rally for Veterans and claimed he had raised $6 million dollars. But he didn’t actually give the money to any charities until the media forced his hand.

The Post provides example after example of Trump promising to donate money to charities, or even worse, claiming that he did donate a lot of money to charities, but there is no record that he ever did. Or if he did, the amounts donated were relatively small, and much smaller than what he claimed.

And then of course there is the fact that Trump refuses to release any tax returns. One can only imagine what is he hiding.

UPDATE: A new document uncovered by The Guardian filed by Wells Fargo Bank with the SEC on behalf of Trump, offers strong evidence that despite Trump’s repeated claims that he is worth more than $10 billion, that in 2012 his net worth was around $4.2 billion (less than half that). Even more troubling, his liquid assets were around $250 million. As The Guardian points out, this puts the lie to Trump’s claim that he could self-fund his presidential campaign. He has already loaned his campaign around $50 million and will need far more than $250 million for the general election.

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Late Night Political Humor

[Jokes from June 21, 2016]

“A new Election Commission report just came out saying that the Trump campaign isn’t doing so well financially, and is practically broke. It’s not good — in fact today, Trump stole a bunch of towels from his own hotel.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Last night, the Federal Election Commission announced how much cash each campaign has on hand. And Hillary Clinton is burying Donald Trump $42 million to $1.3 million. I always knew those huge skyscrapers were overcompensating for something in his pants. I just never imagined it was his wallet.” – Stephen Colbert

“The report revealed that Donald Trump’s campaign started this month with only $1.3 million, which is almost $8 million less than Bernie Sanders’ campaign. – Jimmy Fallon

Even Bernie was like, ‘How does it feel to be poor, you LOSER!'” – Jimmy Fallon

“$1.3 million isn’t even enough to afford a one-bedroom apartment in Trump’s own building. Not that he would want it. I hear the landlord is a jerk.” – Stephen Colbert

“Hundreds of demonstrators showed up in Times Square today to protest Donald Trump’s meeting with evangelical leaders at a nearby hotel. That’s how much those protesters hate Donald Trump: They’re willing to go to Times Square.” – Seth Meyers

“Today members of the conservative Christian clergy met with Donald Trump. They came out of the meeting proclaiming ‘THERE IS NO GOD!'” – Conan O’Brien

“At a meeting with nearly 1,000 evangelical leaders today, Donald Trump told the attendees that Hillary Clinton is not worthy of their prayers. Although I’m pretty sure Hillary’s prayers were already answered when Trump won the GOP nomination.” – Seth Meyers

“The election is still going to be Hillary Clinton versus Donald Trump. It is the very first time in American history that both political parties have the same slogan, ‘2016, look, it is what it is. What are you gonna do.'” – Stephen Colbert

“A recent report found that 52 percent of voters think Hillary Clinton is more intelligent than Donald Trump. While the rest disagreed with that statement ‘bigly’.” – Seth Meyers

“Hillary Clinton gave a speech in Columbus, Ohio, where she called Trump an uncaring businessman. Which I guess is supposed to be an insult, except those are the exact words he has printed on his business card.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Clinton’s senior adviser said if we were to put Trump behind the wheel of the American economy, he would drive us off a cliff. That’s ridiculous. He’s going to drive us into a wall, a nice beautiful wall paid for by Mexico.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Hillary Clinton’s shortlist for running mate includes Sen. Elizabeth Warren, Sen. Tim Kaine, and HUD Secretary Julian Castro. Meanwhile, Donald Trump’s shortlist includes ‘anyone from the cast of Entourage’.” – Conan O’Brien

“President Obama will be attending the Global Entrepreneurship Summit in California. The only place to see more people describing themselves as ‘entrepreneurs’ is on ‘The Bachelorette.'” – Jimmy Fallon

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Trump’s Email Scandal?

The Trump campaign was caught sending fundraising emails to politicians. That wouldn’t be weird, except that they were sent to politicians in other countries, like the UK, Iceland, Australia, and elsewhere. It is hard to know where all the emails went, but there were a lot of them. Multiple email blasts were sent out both before and after Trump’s trip to Scotland to visit his two golf courses.

The main problem is that soliciting campaign donations from foreign nationals is illegal (and for them to actually donate would also violate US law). Already, complaints have been filed with the Federal Election Commission.

The GOP keeps screaming about Clinton’s email, and while she has admitted that it was a bad idea to use a private email server, she didn’t actually violate any laws. Trump isn’t even waiting until he works for the government –– he’s a lawbreaker already (in addition to all the times he violated the law as a businessman).

Trump claims to be a smart businessman, but this move is absolutely stupid. Foreign politicians would have to be idiots to contribute to Trump. Campaign contributions are published public information, and would look really bad in other countries (especially a contribution to someone who is as disliked internationally as Trump).

But there are even more problems. How can anyone believe that Trump is going to place “America First” if he is already selling himself to the highest bidder, including politicians from other countries? Maybe the word “treason” is a little too strong, but not by much.

And finally, this explicitly demonstrates how completely unaware Trump is about world politics. He targeted fundraising emails at foreign conservatives, but “conservative” means something very different in the UK than it does in the US. For example, when Brexit passed, the Conservative Prime Minister in England resigned, while Trump praised it.

UPDATE: The Trump campaign kept sending out these emails, even after it was widely reported that they are illegal. The list of countries whose politicians have received fundraising emails from Trump now includes UK, Australia, Canada, Denmark, Finland, and Iceland. Even worse, fundraising emails are not just being sent from the Trump campaign, similar emails are also being sent to the same people from a pro-Trump super PAC called Crippled America PAC. And it is illegal for super PACs to coordinate with political campaigns.

Talking Points Memo looked up Crippled America PAC and found that as of their last filing a couple of weeks ago, their total budget was $40. That’s right, forty dollars. I wouldn’t be surprised if we ever find out who runs that super PAC, their name is John Baron.

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Trolling the GOP Convention

Ronald Reagan’s son Ron has rented a billboard in Cleveland so he can troll the GOP convention using his father’s own words. Here’s an example:

FFRF
© FFRC

The quote on the billboard really is from the Republican’s Saint Ronnie. The speech it comes from is even more explicit:

We in the United States, above all, must remember that lesson, for we were founded as a nation of openness to people of all beliefs. And so we must remain. Our very unity has been strengthened by our pluralism. We establish no religion in this country, we command no worship, we mandate no belief, nor will we ever. Church and state are, and must remain, separate. All are free to believe or not believe, all are free to practice a faith or not, and those who believe are free, and should be free, to speak of and act on their belief.

Even though Republicans claim to revere Reagan, it is clear that Reagan would have trouble getting elected as a Republican in today’s party. But that’s ok, because the feeling is definitely mutual. Reagan’s other son, Michael, has tweeted that he would not vote for Trump, and that his father wouldn’t have either, saying there’s “nothing really Reaganesque” about Donald Trump.

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Equal Rights

I’m very happy about the Supreme Court ruling throwing out the Texas law that had already closed half the abortion clinics in the state and would have closed half of the remaining clinics if it had fully gone into effect, leaving just ten clinics for the entire state.

What really pisses me off about the whole thing is that proponents of the law just keep claiming that it was only trying to protect the health of women. The law would have required clinics to have the same surgical facilities as full hospitals, even though they are only performing outpatient surgery. The other part of the law required that clinic doctors have admitting privileges to a hospital within 30 miles, which ironically is difficult to get because doctors who perform abortions don’t send enough patients to hospitals.

Even after the ruling, which found that the claim to protect women’s health was merely cover for making abortions harder to obtain, the governor of Texas announced “The decision erodes states’ lawmaking authority to safeguard the health and safety of women” and that the goal of Texas is to ensure “the highest health and safety standards for women”.

Except that making it much harder for women to get an abortion means they will have to have a baby, something that is far more dangerous to the health of a woman than getting an abortion. Or I guess the woman could find someone to give her an illegal abortion, which is even more dangerous.

Besides, when did Republicans start putting even small amounts of health and safety above constitutionally-protected rights? Can you imagine the outcry over a law that closed three-quarters of the gun shops in Texas, and made private gun sales illegal? And that would do far more to protect health and safety.

I mean, why would Texas need more than ten gun shops?

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Is This Becoming the New Normal?

Tom Tomorrow
© Tom Tomorrow

Has it really been just a year since Donald Trump announced he was running for the presidency? It seems way longer for some (unknown) reason. You can make a 23 panel comic just by quoting Trump’s greatest hits from the last year. And as Tom Tomorrow put it “Obviously I’m only scratching the surface, though — sad!”

And the lies just keep on coming. After an embarrassingly bad month of fundraising, Trump’s campaign just announced that a single campaign email blast raised $3.3 million. That’s more than he just raised in a whole month, which is frankly impossible. Plus we remember when he claimed that he raised $6 million for veterans, then had to repeatedly lower that number after the media questioned it.

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Britain Blinks on Brexit

Samantha Bee has a marvelous rant about Brexit and Donald Trump. Extra special bonus for Doctor Who fans (like me!) is having not one but two Doctors from Doctor Who appear (both of them Scottish). Watch David Tennant read aloud some of the hilarious tweets blasting Donald Trump.

And remember, don’t blink!

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The Debt Will Jump Under Trump

Will Republicans start accusing the Wall Street Journal (owned by the same people who own Fox News) of having a liberal bias? It wouldn’t surprise me after they published an article titled “Study Sees Debt Jumping Under Trump, Staying Steady Under Clinton“.

This is not just the WSJ’s opinion. Several studies have analyzed the tax and spending proposals from both major (presumed) candidates, and come to the same conclusion.

The most recent study is from the nonpartisan Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget (who promotes bringing down the national debt). They estimate that under current laws, the national debt will grow to 86% of the entire US economy (mainly driven by an aging population that will increase spending on Social Security and Medicare). So 86% is our baseline.

Under the economic plan put forward by Donald Trump, the US debt will grow to 127% of the entire economy, a stunning increase of $11.5 trillion to the national debt.

On the other hand, Clinton’s plan is estimated to increase the debt to 87% of the US economy (1% more than the baseline, which is within the margin of error for the study).

Other studies, from the Tax Policy Center, and the Tax Foundation, have similar results. They estimate that Trump’s tax changes would reduce government revenues by $9.5 trillion and $10 trillion, respectively.

And of course, there is the analysis from Moody’s Analytics a week ago that found that Trump could plunge the US economy into a prolonged recession with heavy job losses because his policies on immigration and trade would dramatically increase the cost of goods and labor. But that’s only if Trump isn’t lying and really does do what he repeatedly promises to do (although as we have seen with Brexit, even the threat of doing something really stupid was enough to severely damage the economy of the UK).

The bottom line is that Trump is likely to be far worse for our economy than Brexit was for the UK’s. But there may be a silver lining, as Trump could make more money on his golf courses in the US.

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Late Night Political Humor

[Jokes from June 20, 2016]

“Congrats to Chelsea Clinton, who welcomed her second child over the weekend. After the birth, Bill brought flowers, while Hillary brought a focus group to help name the baby.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Chelsea Clinton gave birth to a son this weekend. Unfortunately, due to his young age, he’s a Sanders supporter.” – Seth Meyers

“Even though he has no chance of winning the nomination, taxpayers are still paying for Bernie Sanders to have Secret Service. It’s not that expensive though, it’s just one guy that goes out late at night to buy Fig Newtons.” – Conan O’Brien

“The Cleveland Cavaliers beat the Golden State Warriors last night and became the first NBA team to ever come back from a 3-to-1 deficit to win the championship. Said Bernie Sanders, ‘So you’re saying there’s a chance!'” – Seth Meyers

“Last night, the Cavs made one of the biggest comebacks of all time to defeat the Golden State Warriors, who many people thought were unbeatable. Then Bernie Sanders said, ‘Is everyone as turned on as I am right now?'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Donald Trump thanked crowds in Phoenix for their support this weekend, saying, ‘I feel like a supermodel, except like times ten.’ By the way, ‘supermodel times ten’ is also his spray tan setting.” – Seth Meyers

“Donald Trump has dumped his campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski. Lewandowski said he’s going to return to his old job, as a manager in pro wrestling.” – Conan O’Brien

“Donald Trump fired his campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski. Trump said Lewandowski was controversial, impulsive and short-tempered — and will make a great running mate.” – Jimmy Fallon

“A new poll came out and it claims that 25 percent of voters remain undecided. Apparently, they’re undecided on whether to move to Canada or Mexico.” – Conan O’Brien

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Theory and Practice

The UK Brexit vote has politicians and pundits theorizing about how that vote, and the ensuing economic turmoil, could have any parallels in Donald Trump’s campaign for the US presidency. After all, both Trump and Brexit are fueled by anti-immigrant sentiment and isolationist reactions to increasing globalism.

For a minute, let’s ignore the irony of Trump promoting his golf courses in Scotland while condemning globalism (you know, pretend that he really does believe the things he is saying). Do the arguments about Brexit also apply to America?

My answer is that it doesn’t matter. We have a much better analogy right here in the US of A. And that analogy is Kansas (home of the Koch brothers).

In 2011, Republican Sam Brownback was elected governor of Kansas, along with such a strong majority in the legislature that they ran out of Democrats to hate and started getting rid of the moderate Republicans. And then they implemented the GOP dream agenda. They passed massive tax cuts for the rich, repealed corporate taxes, slashed business regulations, cut spending on education and welfare, rejected federal Medicaid money, and even privatized Medicaid services.

One of the architects of the Kansas “revolution in a cornfield” was the father of trickle-down economics, Arthur Laffer, who promoted the (repeatedly debunked) theory that cutting taxes would increase government revenue. Brownback also hired as his budget director the guy who created the budget model for the Koch Brothers’ Americans for Prosperity.

Brownback’s goal was to take the conservative dream nationwide, saying “My focus is to create a red-state model that allows the Republican ticket to say, ‘See, we’ve got a different way, and it works.'”

Well it didn’t. Job growth in Kansas sucked, even compared to neighboring states. Tax cuts caused huge state deficits. Infrastructure crumbled. Personal income growth slowed dramatically and income inequality increased. Schools ran out of money and closed. The state’s bond rating was downgraded. Kansas started 2016 by entering a recession; their current GDP is still less than it was at the end of 2011.

Things are so bad that companies are actually moving to other states, taking their jobs and revenues with them.

But isn’t that just Kansas? Could the same thing happen in other states? Yes, it could. Louisiana did almost exactly the same thing under Bobby Jindal with even worse results. And Wisconsin famously elected union-buster Scott Walker and their economy suffered, especially compared to neighboring states.

So conservative economics didn’t work, but that doesn’t necessarily imply that liberals could do better. Except that we have an example of a state that did just that, California. And it had another parallel with Trump, as California had previously elected a celebrity with no political experience, Republican Arnold Schwarzenegger, who as governor promised to lead California back to greatness without raising taxes, but ended up a disaster for the state. Things in California were so bad that Republicans used it as the butt of economic jokes.

In 2011, the same year that Kansas elected Brownback, California elected Democrat Jerry Brown as governor and gave the legislature a strong majority. The Democrats raised taxes on millionaires to the highest in the nation. Conservative economists (like the ones who predicted an economic boom in Kansas) predicted this would cause a huge slowdown in growth and other economic problems.

Wrong again. California turned their deficits into budget surpluses, and their economic growth tied for best in the nation. In fact, the economy of California has grown so much that it surpassed the entire country of France, becoming the sixth largest economy in the world.

But that’s just California, right? No, we have another example. At the same time that Wisconsin was trying to become a conservative paradise, neighbor Minnesota switched to a Democratic governor. Bottom line is that when you compare states that swung Republican (like Kansas, Louisiana, and Wisconsin) against states that became Democratic (like California and Minnesota), the Democratic-run states all did far better at job creation and overall economic performance.

These are real results, and this needs to be the message of the Democratic party. And not just for the presidential election (although it is easy to do the same comparison of the economy and jobs under Obama compared to Dubya). This needs to be the message at the congressional and state level. If we let the Republicans get away with destroying our economy with false promises, then we deserve what we get.

Lee Judge
© Lee Judge

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What would it take to get a Trump voter to change their mind?

Jimmy Kimmel wants to know:

This is kinda scary, but it is still funny.

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Why Britain Joined the European Union

This hilarious skit from a British comedy called “Yes Minister” is a little old, but it is suddenly hilarious. And includes a pretty accurate definition of “diplomacy”.

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Location, Location, Location

When Donald Trump was in Scotland opening his new golf course, he tweeted about the UK vote to leave the EU. He responded:

Trump Tweet

This is yet another example of Trump’s inability to understand reality or speak the truth. Scotland voted overwhelmingly (62% to 38%) to remain in the EU. Which brought on a shit-storm of tweets responding to Trump and insulting him with typical Scottish gusto:

SCOTLAND VOTED TO STAY, YOU WITLESS FUCKING COCKSPLAT!

Scotland voted to remain, you tit.

Scotland voted overwhelmingly to stay in Europe you toupéd fucktrumpet

Scotland voted overwhelmingly to STAY in the EU you weaselheaded fucknugget

You’re such a Gobshite. Scotland voted to remain in the EU

You utter and complete eejit. Landslide vote to Remain from Scotland, UK vote only just managed to force us to leave.

Scotland voted overwhelmingly to Remain. But what are facts to you, you bloviating flesh bag.

Scotland voted Remain, you weapons-grade plum.

Scotland voted remain you clueless numpty.

they voted REMAIN you spoon

Scotland hates both Brexit and you, you mangled apricot hellbeast

Delete your golf course.

UPDATE: A new poll done after the Brexit vote says that 59% of Scots would vote for Scotland to leave the UK to become a separate country (and likely join the EU). Only 32% said no, and 9% were undecided.

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Trump’s VP List

Donald Trump’s former campaign manager, who now works for CNN, says that there are “no more than four” names on Trump’s VP list.

I wonder if that has anything to do with the fact that Trump has four children over the age of 21.

Although Jimmy Fallon also has a different possibility:

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Late Night Political Humor

[Jokes from June 16, 2016]

“One year ago today, Donald Trump announced he was running for president as he rode down an escalator. And our country’s been going down that escalator ever since.” – Conan O’Brien

“Today is the one-year anniversary of Donald Trump’s announcement that he would run for president. It’s hard to believe it was only one year ago that Democrats were worried about Jeb Bush.” – Seth Meyers

“Donald Trump said he would, unlike previous presidents, sit down and meet with Kim Jong Un to make a kind of deal but only on U.S. soil. I don’t think that will work. I think they should meet but somewhere neutral, like at a Supercuts.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Donald Trump says, if elected, he is willing to ‘accept’ a visit by Kim Jong Un. Kim Jong Un said, ‘No, thanks, that guy’s crazy.'” – Conan O’Brien

“In a new poll, 35% of Americans say they think Donald Trump will be elected president in November. They also said, ‘Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to finish packing.'” – Seth Meyers

“One of Trump’s big supporters, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, is having a rough week. Lawyers working on the Bridgegate investigation claim that Christie destroyed evidence connecting him to the scandal, including a cellphone. Christie said he had no idea where the cellphone was, then his stomach started ringing.” – Jimmy Fallon

“The DNC accused Russian hackers [of stealing its opposition research on Trump], and Trump is accusing the DNC of leaking it. Accusing the other party of leaking it is like accusing McDonald’s of leaking McNuggets.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Trump said much of the information is false. And if people want to read hundreds of pages of false information about him, they should go to his Twitter page where he writes it himself.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Former Republican candidate Herman Cain said that one of the biggest lies about Donald Trump is that he is a racist. Then Trump was like, ‘Thank you, Jay Z. Give my best to your wife, Oprah.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Oprah has endorsed Hillary Clinton for president. When asked about Hillary’s chances of becoming the most powerful woman in the world, Oprah said, ‘Oh, I’m not stepping down.'” – Conan O’Brien

“The FDA says it found ‘serious health violations’ at some Whole Foods stores and actually sent Whole Foods a warning letter. In response, Whole Foods shredded the letter, mixed it with some kale, and is now selling it for $18 a pound.” – Jimmy Fallon

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