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A Question of Vice

Jack Ohman
© Jack Ohman

I will admit that I have to shake my head when I read or hear someone worry that having Elizabeth Warren as the Democratic nominee for vice president would have “too many women” on the same ticket. I look forward to the day when such concerns are a matter for derision.

But I have a related question, especially for readers who support Bernie Sanders. Would having Elizabeth Warren as the VP make you happier? Would it make you more likely to vote for Clinton (or more likely to vote at all)?

And a question for everyone (not just Sanders supporters). Who would you like to see as Clinton’s VP choice? Personally, I’d like to see Al Franken, because I think he is one of the few people who could make fun of Trump and get away with it. Laughing at Trump seems to be one of the best ways to attack him.

I won’t ask who should be Trump’s VP pick, as I am not sure there is anyone left who would take the job. Imagine having to kiss up to Trump 24/7, knowing that if anything goes wrong, it will somehow be your fault.

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Too Crazy for the NRA

After the Orlando massacre, Donald Trump repeatedly asserted that the people going to the nightclub should have been allowed to carry guns to defend themselves against the shooter. That’s right, Trump actually thought it was a good idea to let people carry weapons while drinking in a dimly lit, noisy nightclub.

You know that’s insane when even the National Rifle Association thinks it is a really bad idea. The NRA’s chief lobbyist retorted “No one thinks that people should go into a nightclub drinking and carrying firearms. That defies common sense. It also defies the law.” And the NRA VP said “I don’t think you should have firearms where people are drinking.”

So Trump backed down from his statement, but he did it in typical disingenuous Trump fashion. He tweeted on Monday that he was “obviously talking about additional guards or employees” at the nightclub. Yeah right. Here’s what he said on a radio show the day after the attack:

It’s too bad that some of the young people that were killed over the weekend didn’t have guns, you know, attached to their hips, frankly, and you know where bullets could have flown in the opposite direction, Howie. It would have been a much different deal. I mean, it sounded like there were no guns.

Not only that, but his excuse doesn’t even hold water. According to FactCheck.org, the nightclub did have armed security the night of the shooting. It was widely reported that an Orlando police officer traded gunshots with the shooter near the entrance to the club, before the shooter moved inside. A CNN news anchor even reminded Trump of this fact during an interview about the attack, but Trump ignored it. And two of the early responding officers who were nearby also shot at the attacker before he retreated into a club bathroom with hostages. There were plenty of guns, and they were used against the attacker, but they didn’t help.

UPDATE: Trump’s flip-flop on allowing nightclubbers to carry is just one of multiple occasions when Trump has changed his position on gun control:

In 2012, Trump tweeted that Obama had “spoken for me and every American” after the Newtown school massacre, talking about the need for gun control. But once he started running for president he routinely accused Obama and Clinton of wanting to destroy the Second Amendment. Just last month he said “The Second Amendment is on the ballot in November. The only way to save our Second Amendment is to vote for a person that you all know named Donald Trump.”

In 2000, Trump wrote in his book that he supported the ban on assault weapons (which expired in 2004). But he did a full flip-flop when he started running for president, claiming that bans on assault weapons were a “total failure”.

Last Wednesday, Trump said he would talk to the NRA about not allowing people on the terrorist watch list to buy guns. But by Sunday, he had modified his position and expressed concern about taking away Second Amendment rights, even for people who are on the list. He has also waffled on whether guns should be allowed in the classroom. I guess if you don’t like Trump’s position on something, you just have to wait a few days until he changes it.

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Racial Profiling

Sunday, Donald Trump doubled down on racism, saying that the US will have to consider the use of racial profiling:

Well I think profiling is something that we’re going to have to start thinking about as a country. Other countries do it, you look at Israel and you look at others, they do it and they do it successfully. And I hate the concept of profiling but we have to start using common sense and we have to use our heads. Other countries do it, and it’s not the worst thing to do.

Seriously?

This is just the latest stupid idea coming from Trump. Immediately after the massacre in Orlando, Trump renewed his call for a ban on Muslims entering the country. Never mind that the shooter was born in the US, so a ban would have done absolutely nothing other than maybe helping to push more unstable Muslims like the Orlando shooter over the edge.

Then he claimed that Muslims should turn in other Muslims who display signs of being radicalized to the police and FBI, ignoring the fact that Muslims are already doing that.

He then tried to blame Orlando on Obama (with help from John McCain), but that didn’t work either.

So now he wants us to crack down on the vast majority of Muslims who are just as appalled by terrorism as the rest of us (probably more so since it can only cause them more problems). Like, is there any way Trump could play into the hands of the terrorists any more than that?

Jeff Stahler
© Jeff Stahler

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Does Trump Measure Up?

This is hilarious. And the https://www.donaldtrumphastinyhands.com website is real!

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When We Were Winners?

Tom Tomorrow
© Tom Tomorrow

Here’s the survey that this comic references. And indeed, as you can plainly see from this graph showing America’s greatest year according to Trump supporters, the most popular year is 2000. Which ironically was the last full year of Bill Clinton’s presidency.

Morning Consult/Lucid

Of course, the numbers are a bit more complex than a single date. Here’s the original data for the survey. And here is an analysis of the data, done by The Atlantic.

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Late Night Political Humor

[Jokes from June 8, 2016]

“It’s official now, Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump have both clinched the nomination for their respective parties. Which means we could be looking at our first female president or our last president.” – Seth Meyers

“In the general election, Donald Trump plans on painting Hillary Clinton as money-grubbing and unethical. Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton plans on painting Donald Trump as Donald Trump.” – Conan O’Brien

“In a prepared speech last night, Donald Trump told supporters he is going to take care of our African-American people. Though, I don’t think he should have added, ‘Once and for all.'” – Seth Meyers

“In an interview, Donald Trump said he won’t have to ask God for ‘much forgiveness’. Unless, of course, God turns out to be a Mexican woman who’s a Muslim.” – Conan O’Brien

“Last night was also a big one for Donald Trump, who destroyed his competition in every state where he had no competition.” – Stephen Colbert

“And last night he shocked the world when he gave his victory speech using a teleprompter. A teleprompter. This from a guy who got this far by shouting whatever comes into his mind. Trump using a teleprompter is like the Flash calling an Uber, Aquaman taking a ferry, or Bernie Sanders using a comb.” – Stephen Colbert

“Hillary Clinton became the first female candidate of a major party. It was an incredible moment 240 years in the making, because I believe that’s when the election began.” – Stephen Colbert

“Even though Hillary has more votes and delegates and superdelegates and states, Bernie Sanders still isn’t giving up. He says he will continue to fight. He’s like one of those old Japanese guys on an island who thinks the war is still going on.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Hillary Clinton told supporters last night that her status as the Democratic nominee is thanks to the generations who struggled and sacrificed before her. ‘You’re welcome’, said Bernie Sanders.” – Seth Meyers

“You know who could use ‘Ghostbusters’ right now? Hillary Clinton. She’s still being haunted by a spooky ghost named Bernie.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Despite Hillary Clinton clinching the Democratic nomination, Bernie Sanders vowed to stay in the race and told supporters in Los Angeles that the struggle continues. The struggle to understand math?” – Seth Meyers

“Bernie Sanders is vowing to stay in the race until the Democratic convention. He says he owes it all to his supporters, who need something to do until Burning Man.” – Conan O’Brien

“It’s being reported that Bernie Sanders is planning on cutting half of his campaign staff. Bernie said, ‘I’m saving money by only keeping the most delusional.'” – Conan O’Brien

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Make America Hate Again

Ruben Bolling
© Ruben Bolling

Can there be any doubt that the main appeal of Donald Trump is racism and bigotry?

Of course, this is all Barack Obama’s fault. If he hadn’t gotten elected president (and he had the audacity to even be reelected), would there have been any need for Republicans to question his birth, his religion, or his morals?

And if Hillary Clinton gets elected, then the resulting sexism will be her fault.

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Late Night Political Humor

[Jokes from June 7, 2016]

“Today, presidential primaries are being held in California, Montana, New Jersey, New Mexico, North Dakota, and South Dakota. Or, as it’s being reported in the media, California.” – Conan O’Brien

“It’s being reported that Hillary Clinton now has enough delegates to secure the Democratic nomination. Hillary was so excited when she found out she asked her staff to schedule 15 seconds of smiling.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Hillary told her assistant to break out the champagne. And he said, ‘Actually you drank it all when Trump secured his nomination. Do you remember that?'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Hillary Clinton today responded to her status as the presumptive nominee, calling it a ‘historic, unprecedented moment’. Said Hillary, ‘Never in my wildest dreams did I think it would take this long.'” – Seth Meyers

“The Clinton folks aren’t happy about the media jumping the gun on her clinching it. She wanted to announce that at her victory rally tonight, so when she does announce, everyone please act like you didn’t see this coming.” – Stephen Colbert

“Hillary had to reach the threshold of 2,383 delegates to become the presumptive nominee. Hillary hasn’t been this excited about a threshold since the one she carried Bill over on their wedding night.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi said it would be great if Hillary Clinton picked a female running mate. She said it during a speech entitled ‘Hint Hint’.” – Conan O’Brien

“It looks like the general election will come down to Hillary Clinton versus Donald Trump. Which is fitting, really, since she’ll be the first female nominee of her party, and he’ll be his party’s last nominee.” – Stephen Colbert

“Paul Ryan said what Trump is saying about a judge of Mexican heritage is the ‘textbook definition’ of a racist comment. Even worse, that textbook is made by Trump University.” – Jimmy Fallon

“House Speaker Paul Ryan described Donald Trump’s remarks about a Hispanic judge as a ‘textbook definition’ of racism. When they heard this, Trump supporters said, ‘You lost us at textbook.'” – Conan O’Brien

“It is being reported that Ivanka Trump is writing a book titled ‘Women Who Work: Rewriting the Rules of Success.’ Which is better than the original title, ‘Help! My Dad’s a Nectarine!'” – Seth Meyers

“President Obama yesterday called the Denver Broncos one of the greatest defenses of all time. ‘Wow, thanks!’ said the Army.” – Seth Meyers

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This Week in Trump

The (conservative) National Review reviews this week in Trump:

Trump on Thursday: Trump announces that he will persuade the NRA to support a law “not allowing people on the terrorist watch list, or the no fly list, to buy guns”. Up until then, love of guns was just about the only issue uniting all conservatives and Republicans. But Trump had to blow that.

Trump on Tuesday: The other issue uniting conservatives and Republicans (other than Libertarians) was love of the military and respect for America’s soldiers. So Trump suggests that American troops in Iraq were a bunch of thieves: “Iraq, crooked as hell. How about bringing baskets of money — millions and millions of dollars — and handing it out? I want to know who were the soldiers that had that job, because I think they’re living very well right now, whoever they may be.”

Trump’s campaign tried to claim that Trump was talking about Iraqi soldiers, but nobody sane believes that. Especially since last fall Trump said the same thing, but that time clearly about US soldiers.

And that’s not all. We’ve already discussed Trump’s insensitive remarks about the mass shooting in Orlando, and his dog whistles insinuating “that President Obama might be an ISIS sleeper agent”.

Is there anyone who has not been personally insulted by Trump? Not just all minorities, women, but now the entire Republican base.

It is enough to make conservatives suspect that Trump is purposely trying to hand the White House to Hillary Clinton while tarnishing the GOP’s brand for a generation.

At the very least, it is scaring the hell out of Republican politicians. They are so terrified, they are refusing to comment about Trump. On Tuesday, Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell ran away from reporters, saying “I’m not going to be commenting on the presidential candidates today”. Senator Roger Wicker (R-MS) said “I’m not gonna make a career out of responding to every comment and every tweet”. And Senator Bob Corker (R-TN) said “I have offered public encouragement at important times, but I must admit that I am personally discouraged by the results”.

National Review’s conclusion? “With Trump as the nominee, every Republican lawmaker will be left doing damage control every day for the remainder of the election.” They still think the Republicans should dump Trump at the convention and replace him with “any other Republican”.

UPDATE: And Trump keeps on being Trump. On Saturday Trump made fun of Bernie Sanders, saying “Crazy Bernie, he’s crazy as a bedbug but you know, he doesn’t quit”. Trump encouraged Sanders to stay in the fight against Clinton, taunting “If he gives up we’ll say ‘Bernie, you’re a loser, you gave up.’” Pissing off Sanders (or his supporters) is just the thing to get them to start fighting to get Clinton elected.

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Old Time Religion!

When are religious voters going to get tired of being jerked around by Republicans?

Last week at a supposedly religious event in Washington titled the “Faith & Freedom Coalition’s Road to Majority” conference, social conservatives were told that Donald Trump is the only choice for evangelicals. Conference leader Ralph Reed cited Trump’s positions on abortion, gay marriage, and the list of socially conservative judges that Trump says he will appoint to the Supreme Court.

Which is complete bullshit. Trump “has been pro-choice most of his life, was and is pro-gay, and has no problem with transgender people using whatever bathroom they like.” Not to mention that Trump frequently swears in public, has bragged about his adultery, says derogatory things about women, and is no model of Christian charity or forgiveness. In fact, it seems like the only time Trump turns the other cheek is so he can lie out of both sides of his mouth. And why would anyone believe Trump’s list of Supreme Court appointees, when it seems more likely that he would appoint one of his children.

The most ironic part is how Reed explained away Trump’s complete lack of religious (and moral) values. He told the audience that they shouldn’t be searching for perfection in their political leaders, saying that there’s only one example of perfection in human history, “and that’s Jesus Christ. Unlike a lot of our friends on the other side, we’re not looking for a political Messiah. Because we already have a Messiah.”

And Reed added that God “uses imperfect people to achieve his perfect will.” Or He will, but only if you vote for Trump (even though Hillary Clinton is far more religious than Trump).

The conference also endorsed Trump’s proposed wall, and invoked the wall around Jerusalem as the reason why Trump’s wall to keep Mexicans out would work. Completely ignoring the fact that the current wall around Jerusalem was built by Sultan Suleiman when Jerusalem was part of the Ottoman Empire, and the wall before that was built to keep out the Crusaders (and the wall before that was built by the Romans, etc.). The Christians never built any wall around Jerusalem; several of the walls were specifically built to keep the Christians out.

But why let facts get in the way?

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Trump Just Got Pwned by a 13-Year-Old

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Give Me a Sign

Stephen Colbert deciphers Trump’s statements about Obama:

UPDATE: Seth Meyers also takes an eloquent shot at Trump:

This segment points out Trump’s hypocrisy and lies. Like when Trump said “I’m far better for the gay community than [Hillary Clinton] is.” Meyers followed this with videos of one of the many times that Trump said that he is against gay marriage, and promising to appoint a Supreme Court justice who will overturn the decision that made gay marriage legal.

In return for Trump banning the Washington Post from his campaign events, Meyers banned Trump from appearing on his show.

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The Gun Problem

Australian comedian Jim Jefferies uses humor to point out why US gun laws are crazy. Being from Australia, which suffered the worst mass shooting in the world before they decided to pass strict gun laws to prevent future tragedies, gives him a good perspective on what the rest of the world must think of all the gun violence here.

I also commend him for taking a subject (gun deaths) that is not the least bit funny and using humor to point out how ridiculous we are.

This video is an excerpt from his Netflix special. It is from 2014, but of course nothing has changed since then (actually it has gotten worse):

Alternatively, you might want to watch the whole thing (I did!), which is split into two videos: Part 1, Part 2.

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How Trump Will Cost You Money

I’ve talked to many different financial advisors in my time, and I have to say that most of them were more interested in selling me investments that would make them rich, than investments that would make me any money. The problem is commissions.

If a financial advisor talks to you for free, then you are the product. They have to make money somehow, and so selling you things that pay them high commissions is required. And an investment that pays advisors big commissions, by definition, is going to make less money for you. Often, no money at all. In fact, estimates say that bad advice from financial advisors costs retirement savers $17 billion every year.

That’s why John Oliver’s show on financial planning should be required viewing:

Most Americans are being screwed by financial advisors.

You may be asking, what does this have to do with Donald Trump? Well, in April, the Obama administration passed a fiduciary rule, which simply states that financial advisors have a fiduciary responsibility to their customers. In plain English, they can’t purposely cheat people. Seems very reasonable to me. After all, snake oil sales were made illegal a long time ago, why should financial advisors be allowed to lie to you about what their “products” will do?

So of course, Republicans in Congress voted to overturn the rule, claiming that their bill will “protect access to affordable retirement advice”. Well, yeah, it does protect access to cheap, worthless advice that will cost you lots of money.

Then Obama vetoed their bill. For anyone out there wanting to curb the excesses of Wall Street, this should be big news. So the fiduciary rule stands. The Fiscal Times says this rule will “mark an important breakthrough in regulating financial advisers who may prey on older Americans trying to make sense of their holdings and strategies for maximizing their life savings.”

Now, does anyone doubt that Donald Trump would not have vetoed the Republican bill? Given his history of cheating people out of their savings in Trump University, is there any doubt that he would have been a cheerleader for allowing financial advisors to cheat and steal as much as they want?

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The Only Way to Defeat Terrorism

A former covert CIA agent learned some hard truths about terrorism, and how to defeat it. Are we capable of listening? Can we ever learn this lesson?

If this doesn’t make you think differently about terrorism, then nothing will.

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