Political Irony

“Former Vice President Dick Cheney is working on his memoirs. People say when the book comes out President Bush is not going to be happy. Not because the book is critical of Bush, but because it’s one of those books that’s all words.” -Conan O’Brien

“Dick Cheney is back in the news. He’s talking about his memoirs. Cheney said that George George Bush stopped taking his advice during the second term of their Administration. And in Bush’s defense, I think it’s pretty natural to lose trust in a guy who shoots his friends in the face.” -Jimmy Fallon

“Apparently Dick Cheney, is coming out with a memoir, and he said during the second term, Bush stopped taking his advice. That has got to hurt. When the most gullible man in America stops buying your bullshit. … It’s so annoying when your boss is disobedient.” -Bill Maher

“And this happens with every administration. I mean, Obama only listened to Joe Biden for — never.” -Jimmy Fallon

“It’s been reported that former Vice President Cheney is hard at work on his memoirs. It’s called ‘The Five People You Meet in Hell.'” -Conan O’Brien

“Cheney also explained that the statute of limitations has expired on remaining silent about the Bush administration. Meanwhile, George Bush said: ‘I love the statue of limitations. Beautiful lady. Is the torch open? Got to climb in the torch.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Former President Bill Clinton was recently asked about his wife Hillary’s 11-day trip to Africa. And he said, ‘I wish she were home.’ Then he said, ‘By which, I mean, I wish her home was Africa.'” -Conan O’Brien

“Speaking of former President Clinton — have you heard about this? There are two American male hikers and one female hiker imprisoned in Iran. Some people are saying Bill Clinton should go rescue them. When asked about the idea, Clinton said, ‘I am one third on it.'” -Conan O’Brien