“In a recent interview, Ben Carson said that Thomas Jefferson wrote the U.S. Constitution, when he actually wrote the Declaration of Independence. Or as Carson’s campaign staff put it, ‘Close enough!” – Jimmy Fallon
“Donald Trump was recently being interviewed, and said that he’s not a fan of the man bun trend, and wouldn’t want to wear his hair that way. You know it’s bad when even Donald Trump is like, ‘I’m not putting that on my head.'” – Jimmy Fallon
“I saw that NBC has officially granted Mike Huckabee, John Kasich, Jim Gilmore and Lindsey Graham free airtime to equal Donald Trump’s recent Saturday Night Live appearance. When asked how they’ll feature the candidates, NBC was like, ‘Let’s just say the Thanksgiving Day Parade just got a few more clowns.'” – Jimmy Fallon
“We are just 15 days away from when ‘Time’ magazine chooses its annual person of the year. There’s an online poll where readers can vote for their pick, and currently leading in that online poll is Democratic hopeful Bernie Sanders. This is ironic, because I’m not sure Bernie Sanders has ever even been online.” – James Corden
“Seriously, if he wanted to vote for himself, he’d have to go to a library. But this is going to be a real thrill for Bernie because he actually remembers when time came onto the scene. Not Time Magazine, just actual time.” – James Corden
“Bernie Sanders has gotten a lot of attention for a meeting he had with outspoken activist/rapper Killer Mike. It looks like Killer Mike could wear Bernie in a Baby Bjorn. How are you going to stand up to Vladimir Putin when you look like you need a booster seat?” – James Corden
