“Donald Trump got in some trouble for saying that John McCain is not a war hero, and said, ‘I like people that weren’t captured.’ Not good. In fact, Trump’s people are telling him to lay low for a while until this all combs over.” – Jimmy Fallon
“On Saturday Donald Trump had some unkind words for Arizona Senator John McCain. Can you imagine being tortured 5 1/2 years in a Vietnamese prison camp, and then a man whose greatest war-time accomplishment was brokering a peace treaty on ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ between Gary Busey and Meat Loaf belittles you and calls you a loser?” – Jimmy Kimmel
“The closest Trump ever got to battle was his fight with Rosie O’Donnell.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“Maybe we should enter Donald Trump in a surf competition. Even if he doesn’t get eaten by a shark it would be worth it to see him with his hair wet, right?” – Jimmy Kimmel
“Rick Perry said Donald Trump is unfit to be president and called for him to immediately withdraw from the race. Then he said, ‘And that’s coming from ME!'” – Jimmy Fallon
“Perry actually said Trump is a toxic mix of demagoguery and nonsense who is unfit to be president. Then Perry took off his glasses and said, ‘Whoa! I think these things are magic!'” – Jimmy Fallon
“Rick Perry said this weekend that he believes Boy Scouts would be ‘better off if they didn’t have openly gay scoutmasters.’ Man, between the Boy Scouts and gay marriage, Republicans really don’t want gays tying the knot.” – Seth Meyers
