Skip to content

The New GOP Budget Explained

Paul Ryan explains how his new budget will work for America, returning our country to what it was under the founding fathers:

“Under this plan, if you lose your job and have your house foreclosed, the government isn’t going to bail you out any more.” Instead, any American who can no longer compete in the nation’s economy will become the property of a millionaire. “This budget will create tens of millions of new jobs at no cost to the government, millions of new unpaid factory workers, field hands and fast food servers. This country did pretty well when the Founding Fathers, in their infinite wisdom, owned slaves. Ending that system has proved to be a colossal mistake,” the Wisconsin Republican continued. “This budget lays out a blueprint for returning this country to the greatness the signers of the Declaration of Independence envisioned.”

Wall Street closed sharply higher on expectations of strong demand for domestically produced leg irons, whips and stockades, and in anticipation of a rebounding housing market, with tens of millions of new housing units for slaves being built if the Ryan budget is enacted.

Share

6 Comments

  1. Iron Knee wrote:

    I worry when I post sarcasm without a warning label, but this one seemed just too obvious. And funny.

    Sunday, March 25, 2012 at 2:01 am | Permalink
  2. rk wrote:

    What??? That was sarcasm?

    But, but, the bible condones slavery. Everyone knows that!

    Sunday, March 25, 2012 at 9:08 am | Permalink
  3. ANONYMOUS wrote:

    I was skeptical, but I did think there was a chance that the above statement was real. Some of the things said during this election cycle (i.e. “Corporations are people, my friend.”) have been so ridiculous that it wouldn’t surprise me to see the GOP go that far off the deep end. And on some level, you know that the GOP has an ignorance and lack of respect for the poor and middle class that isn’t far off from the sentiments reflected in that statement.

    Sunday, March 25, 2012 at 10:48 am | Permalink
  4. Arthanyel wrote:

    It’s not sarcasm – it is an accurate forecast of the outcome of the Republican agenda. Of course they will never say anything of the sort, but if we kill the social safety net and move to a government core philosophy of “I have mine, so screw you” the what other outcome can be expected?

    There is a possibility that instead we will have a civil war and the country will be destroyed as tens of millions of hungry, desperate people revolt. But I don’t think either outcome is acceptable, which is why. A fighting against this destructive Republican agenda.

    I agree we need to significantly cut spending but not destroy the country in the process.

    Sunday, March 25, 2012 at 11:47 am | Permalink
  5. Michael wrote:

    The more I see the way things are going, the more I think Philip K. Dick’s visions of the future are accurate. Basically, you have wealthy elites who can do whatever they want, all-powerful militarized police forces that can throw you in forced labor camps at will, pervasive surveillance that forces the masses into submission, and bland, mindless entertainment that quells any hint of revolution.

    Sometimes, it feels like we’re already there…

    Sunday, March 25, 2012 at 1:01 pm | Permalink
  6. Iron Knee wrote:

    I for one aspire to be as bland and mindless as possible.

    Sunday, March 25, 2012 at 10:40 pm | Permalink