“Today is the midterm elections. The Washington Post is predicting that there’s a 98 percent chance of the Republicans taking the Senate and The New York Times says there’s a 75 percent chance. And CNN said, ‘Wait, that’s today?'” – Jimmy Fallon
“In the midterm elections, a 102-year-old woman voted for the first time in a U.S. election. Unfortunately, she voted for Woodrow Wilson.” – Conan O’Brien
“During a speech on Sunday, President Obama said to the crowd, ‘We’ve got to vote. Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote.’ This went on for an hour until someone finally fixed his teleprompter.” – Jimmy Fallon
“Kim Kardashian tweeted that she is supporting President Obama in the midterm elections. I think it worked because all of the polls are predicting that after tonight Barack Obama will still be president of the United States.” – Conan O’Brien
“Democrats have been doing everything they can to get young people and college students to vote in the midterms. Though if you want students to participate in something, maybe you shouldn’t call them midterms.” – Jimmy Fallon
“Utah could elect its first black Republican woman to Congress. In other words, Utah finally got one black person and the first thing they want to do is send her to Washington.” – Conan O’Brien
“In Montana, a math teacher is running for the Senate. Win or lose, she plans on demanding a recount because math is fun.” – Conan O’Brien
“President Obama spent Election Day away from any press coverage, attending closed-door meetings inside the White House. But on the bright side, it is nice to see some doors actually closed at the White House. It’s a whole new Secret Service security thing.” – Jimmy Fallon
“Today isn’t just Election Day. It’s National Candy Day today. I don’t know. Didn’t we just have National Candy Day — Halloween? That’s National Candy Day. Today should be National Candy Nobody Wanted to Eat But It’s the Only Thing Left in the Trick-or-Treat Bag Day.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“Tomorrow is National Healthy Eating Day. But tomorrow is also National Doughnut Day, which seems like bad planning.” – Jimmy Kimmel
