“Anybody try to sign up for the Obamacare? It’s impossible, and everybody’s furious. The Republicans are upset about Obamacare because something they tried to stop now won’t get started.” – David Letterman
“It’s really trick-or-treat time at the White House. President Obama tricked us into thinking we’d be able to afford treatment.” – Jay Leno
“Con artists are using Obamacare confusion to sign people up for fake health insurance. The scammers lure victims with false promises like, ‘If you like your healthcare plan, you can keep your healthcare plan.’ The scammers will tell you that, so you have to be careful.” – Jay Leno
“A lot of people are accusing the president of being less than truthful. In fact, a couple of weeks ago President Obama called me and told me personally that if I like my current job, I can keep my current job. And I believed him!” – Jay Leno
“The president said he didn’t know that we were spying on our allies. He didn’t know about the problems with the healthcare website. Have you heard the latest? Now the president claims he doesn’t know how ‘Breaking Bad’ ended.” – Jay Leno
“A new study found that 30 percent of Americans admit to getting most of their news on Facebook. You can tell news anchors are trying to compete with Facebook because tonight Brian Williams’ top story was just a picture of his cat.” – Jimmy Fallon
