[This post was submitted by special ironic correspondent Avi Brand]
The recent blockbuster news flash that Disney is buying Marvel Entertainment for $4 Billion made me wonder once again who is the worse President of the United States: Barack Obama as portrayed by the Marvel Universe, or Barack Obama as portrayed by Fox News. Well, I decided to stack them up head-to-head to settle the question once and for all.
The newly elected Marvel Universe Barack Obama made one of the most infamous cabinet appointments of all time, choosing Norman Osborn (formerly the murderous and insane Green Goblin) as head of all global peacekeeping agencies, including the revered Avengers. This version of Barack Obama has literally handed the reins of world peace and safety over to one of the most evil men on this or any other planet. Osborn has already clandestinely allied himself with Doctor Doom, Namor the Sub-Mariner, Loki the Norse God of Mischief, and the Criminal Syndicate Boss/Demon Sorcerer The Hood in an attempt to cement his power base and further extend his villainous tentacles into every corner of the Marvel Universe. Meanwhile, his agents are hunting down heroes like Tony Stark (Iron Man) and even Captain America, the very symbol of American power. And all with the Marvel Universe Obama’s tacit approval. Makes Reverend Wright and Bill Ayers look like kindergartners.
The Fox News Barack Obama is a shady, smooth-talking totalitarian communist who is on an unholy mission to strengthen the federal government by any means necessary to a deadly sharp edge at home while systematically weakening our military oversees. His failed economic policies have destroyed this great country that we grew up in, and he will stop at nothing to blame America first for any problem anywhere in the world. Under his iron-fisted rule, the US will devolve into a Soviet-style, Nazi dictatorship that will enforce mandatory abortions on women, Koran classes on men, and euthanasia for old people. After barely seven months in office, he is already the worst president this nation has ever had. He is certainly the most anti-American. Makes Stalin and Hitler look like amateurs.
So who’s worse?
While Fox News Barack Obama is certainly a terrible tyrant and a phony (I certainly wouldn’t vote for him), his evil pales in comparison to what the naive, weak, and ineffectual Marvel Universe Barack Obama has allowed to happen. Norman Osborn holds the real reigns of power in that world (kind of like Dick Cheney) and he is putting his nefarious plans into action as we speak. The Marvel Universe electorate would do well to elect a Republican in 2012.
Hmmm… I wonder what The Marvel Universe Fox News is saying about Norman Osborn? No doubt that he’s doing what’s necessary to protect us from the Skrulls.
– Avi Brand
7 Comments
Yeah well, did you cry foul when Marvel showed George Bush wetting himself when Magneto attacked him?
I’m glad to see Marvel can show that ANY president in the Marvel universe can be made a fool by villians.
I totally agree with your second paragraph, AmericanDust. In fact, you make a very important and sublime point. All of us, including presidents, are fallible. We are all capable of evil. That is why we need limits on power — checks and balances. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. My only comment is that you don’t need a villain to turn you into anything, fool or otherwise.
I guess I was “crying foul” more on Fox News than on Marvel. Marvel could show Obama punching out Steve Rogers as he comes back to life and I wouldn’t care. They never claim to think it’s REAL. Whereas Fox News portrays Obama as basically a cackling supervillian, but claim it’s all true.
You obviously missed the point of the entire article, sir!
Claim it’s all true? I thought that Fox News just “reports” and “you decide”. 🙂
By the way, everyone should thank Avi for an excellent article. In fact, he might have done too good a job comparing Fox News to Marvel, since nobody has bothered to point out that one of them is fictional on purpose.
Iron Knee. I thought about pointing out the oddities of recognized fiction vs rhetoric, but couldn’t make it go anywhere interesting.
I also tried to find some other sort of either/or that would be illuminating, but I’ve not landed on one to try to write up for you. (Hopefully, there’s a “yet” in that sentence, but I don’t know.)
I wonder what an Archies Comic Obama would look like…
He’d proly be the first openly gay, one legged, half blind, balding, suffering for gender disorder, african american character in an Archie Comic. Their all about pushing the envelope!